Thursday, October 30, 2008

My body hates pregnancy, it's not my fault!

This body of mine just HATES having a baby inside it. I think it sees the baby as poison or something. Of course there is the sickness part during which my body tries to get the baby out via my throat? At least that's what it feels like. And now I'm in the part where my uterus voices it's opinion with harsh contractions trying to push that baby out the normal way. They hurt, and they bug me, and last night I dreamed I was in labor all night, I guess the contractions continued while I slept. The boys have come at 37, 36, and 35 weeks respectively, and it makes me wonder if this one won't come at 34 weeks. My goal with Daws and Henry was to make it to 37 weeks. With this one, I'm not even shooting for that, I'm just HOPING to make it to 36 weeks. Realistic goals leave you with less disappointment right? I felt like such a failure with Henry that I didn't make it further. It's a good thing he was healthy!

Not that I'm complaining (Okay, I kind of am) but how do some people's bodies LOVE being pregnant, and my body hates it? I mean how can people escape that "sorrow in thy conception" that resulted from the fall?

On a happy note, the nausea is SO much better. Completely controllable with some club soda and spearmint gum! I think I may not even throw up again in this pregnancy! And all these contractions toughen me up for the delivery. I'm actually thinking of going without an epidural this time. I figure nobody's body prepares them longer and more for delivery than mine! Mine gets a really early start.

And of course, it will all be worth it when I have another silly little boy with ridiculously blue eyes to kiss, snuggle, nurse, kiss, adore, show-off, oh and did I mention kiss? I LOVE kissing the brand new skin of a newborn!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I know it's unfair

That I somehow got the 3 cutest boys in the whole world. Warning: This is a pure bragging post. If that bothers you, please don't read on. But this is my journaling system, and I need to record these bragging thoughts!

These boys are the best, I just feel so lucky to be their mom. I can hardly wait to see what this fourth boy is going to be like, but if he's anything like his brothers, we can't go wrong.

I've mentioned before that Dave labeled our kids with "s". Each child has their own strength (They have weaknesses too, but that's not for this post!)

Isaac- Smart. Isaac is a fantastic oldest child, and we are learning that he is very smart. This is a typical trait for an oldest child, and that is certainly proving true for him. He amazes me with the things he remembers, puts together, and catches onto so fast. I am enjoying teaching joy school this week, and seeing how bright he is. He picks up on new concepts very fast, and is doing great with his reading lessons. I am so proud of Isaac, and hopefully his smarts make him a lot of money some day and he can pass some of that on to me!

Dawson- Strong. He is our hope for an athlete. He is strong and driven. He is a natural at sports, and can tackle Isaac down in a second. Maybe he can get a good athletic scholarship someday, and hopefully not break too many bones in the process!

Henry- Sweet. I know I've written plenty about Henry's sweet nature. It's amazing, I can't quite get over it.

My boys are cute and fun, and so full of personality and life! I can't wait to have four little boys monkeying around.




Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My apologies

My apology to the friend that I wrote about earlier. I thought my comments were witty, but obviously weren't received in the same manner I intended them. I felt like I was wronged, but I handled it very poorly. I dearly love this friend, and she already apologized and had no intention of hurting me. I also apologize to any others who might be offended. Please forgive me,
Erica

It's a....

I don't have anything creative or fun ready like I wanted to, but I do have this letter that I wrote to the baby last week. It is very long, I don't know how many people will read it, but I will post it nonetheless. I have been very hesitant to share this news due to my fear of people's reactions, but I think I am ready for all the tactless and insensitive things that people may say. You know, like, "Oh no! Not another boy." That kind of thing gets to me, so I didn't want to tell the whole world until I felt tough enough to handle all of that. Please know I am very excited and grateful for this news.


To my dear fourth son,

It is October 23, 2008, I am 16 weeks pregnant, and you are approximately 20 weeks from being born if history repeats itself. In non-pregnant time, that flies by pretty quick, but in pregnant time that seems like eternity. It was just this week that I found out it was you. Honestly, I hoped you would come fifth. My “perfect” family plan would have bumped you back a few years to separate the two sisters that I want you to have. Girls need space, and I thought our family needed that balance. Don’t get me wrong, I have always wanted you. From the time I got pregnant with your oldest brother, Isaac, I knew I wanted at least 4 boys, if not 5. And of course your father would have been disappointed if you had not come now.

On Monday the doctor performed an early ultrasound in which we couldn’t tell what we were looking at. He gave us a 60% chance that you were a girl! As I looked at the pictures that night I realized that you were not a girl. I scheduled another ultrasound for the next day at a place called Fetal Fotos. The ultrasound was incredible. It was so much clearer than the one I saw the day earlier. Like the day before, you lay perfectly still for the ultrasound, and we had the perfect chance to see if you were a boy or girl. It was very clear. You are most certainly a boy. I enjoyed the rest of the ultrasound, but was crying as soon as I got to the car. I didn’t even understand why I was crying, which made me want to cry even more. I drove myself straight to the mall to buy you the most adorable newborn clothes that you don’t even need. Dad called after he was done teaching his class. I told him we were having a boy. He asked me how I was doing. I never could spit out an answer. Tears streaming down my face in the middle of Gymboree, I listened to your father carry on about the tremendous blessing of having a fourth boy, and how this was the dream. His dream, not mine.

My heart ached for so many reasons. The first, and probably strongest being my protective “mother bear” instincts that didn’t and don’t want anyone else to be disappointed that you are you. Almost every person reacted to this pregnancy with the expectation or hope that you were a girl. It’s only natural. But I remember some of the reactions when I was pregnant with your brother Henry, and watching peoples lips curl up a bit when they realized we were having a third boy. Some even went as far as saying, “Not another boy!” Or apologizing. I can only imagine what they will say this time. And of course there is the ever present yearning in nearly every human being to experience the parenting of both genders. That shouldn’t bother me, I have always known that you have at least one sister who is yet to come. So I’m not giving up that experience by you coming now. And what ever happened to that 50/50 chance? I don’t think I could flip a coin and get the same outcome four times in a row! But then again I recall cheating on the penny experience in my statistics class. Instead of flipping the same coin, we decided to get “much pennies” and throw them all to save time. It wasn’t my idea, but it sounded good at the time. So maybe I could flip a coin and get the same outcome four times, I’m starting to think I would be pretty good at that ;)

I went back to Grammy’s house after shopping and asked her to come on a drive with me. She had 5 girls in a row. She understood me. She spoke loving words and listened as I cried. Even with her being my mother, I don’t think I would have trusted her as much as I did being that she has been through similar experiences. That night I went to Young Women’s, where there are two leaders with same-gender families. One with 5 girls, and one with 4 boys. I felt they were the only people who knew how to react, they understood exactly how I felt.
I have had two days to contemplate my thoughts and feelings now. I have looked at your pictures, and watched the DVD of you. You are absolutely perfect! I see you resting your face in your hand, with your feet floating in amniotic fluid. You are so still, calm, peaceful. You are beautiful, and I can’t wait to meet you. I want you now more than you know. I’m sorry that I wanted you to be a girl, and I am so glad that you are coming now! I can’t wait to see if you look like your brothers. What color of lightsaber will you want? Dad has labeled the other boys: smart, strong, and sweet. Which “s” will you be, a repeat, or a new “s”? Will you have that elusive dark hair that I’ve been waiting for, or will I give birth to another surfer boy with white fur on his head like Daws? Whatever you look like, whoever you become, that all remains to be seen. I know that in about 20 weeks we will bring you home in the world’s tiniest monkey suit after the whirlwind which will be your birthday. In the meantime son, it’s just you and me for 20 more weeks which I will spend vacillating between cherishing every moment, and complaining that you could never come soon enough. Probably a little bit heavier on the latter though.

Love,
Mom



Sunday, October 26, 2008

Happy Birthday dear Bubba!

Happy Birthday to my sweetest little boy Henry. It's been one year of pure joy with this boy. I still believe that he is the most pleasant human being on this earth. He is practically perfect in every way, and so very cute! Here are some facts from his first year:

-Was shown "smiling" in the womb in his u/s
-Slept 7 hours at night when he was only 4 days old
-LOVED nursing
-Broke his first tooth at 6 months
-Started very early crawling at less than 5 months
-Just started walking a few weeks before his birthday
-Had ear infections all summer and ended up with tubes
-Cracked his skull a few weeks back, and never made a fuss about it (He just had a big bubble on the side of his head, luckily it's healed now)
-Is so quiet that we "lose" him frequently. He doesn't answer when you call him!
-Has slept as long as 16 hours at night (several times in fact)
-Usually sleeps 12-13 hours
-Uh-oh was his first word
-Waving was his first trick
-Has the cutest nose and the bluest eyes!

It's been no secret that we absolutely adore everything about this child. I figure I've told him at least 3,000 times in his life that he is the sweetest thing I've ever met. And I mean it.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Isaac's Interview today.

I saw this on my friends blog, and wanted to see how Isaac did. It's pretty cute.

1. What is something mom always says to you? You’re welcome

2. What makes mom happy? When I do good things

3. What makes mom sad? When I don’t do good things

4. How does your mom make you laugh? Make a funny face

5. What was your mom like as a child? I don't know. Tell me

6. How old is your mom? I don't know. 7359?

7. How tall is your mom? 39

8. What is her favorite thing to do? Clean up (Uggh, if only he knew the truth!)

9. What does your mom do when you're not around? Take care of my brothers

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? Cause you love people.

11. What is your mom really good at? Taking care of people

12. What is your mom not very good at? Killing bugs

13. What does your mom do for her job? I don’t know.

14. What is your mom's favorite food? Salad

15. What makes you proud of your mom? That you get me chocolate milk.

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? Jet Fusion

17. What do you and your mom do together? Snuggle

18. How are you and your mom the same? Nothing

19. How are you and your mom different? You’re a girl and I’m a boy.

20. How do you know your mom loves you? Cause you’re my mom

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Potty Training Himself

Dawson has been taking his diaper off for months now. It drives me crazy! He refuses to sit in a wet or poopy diaper and so without asking me, he takes it off. I've felt like I should potty train him, but I feel like he's too young. I've had a lot of great advice to wait until 3 to potty train boys, and my friends who have trained their kids early have all had a ton of accidents lingering way past training. I have very little tolerance, and accidents almost do me in! So I've been hoping to wait until closer to when the baby comes

But Dawson seems to be training himself now. The past couple of days when he wouldn't keep a diaper on, I let him wear underpants. He hasn't had an accident yet. Yesterday he was completely dry all day! Wow! But he didn't poop all day, I'm worried he's going to get constipated because he is holding it in.

I know we're not free and clear from diapers yet, but he seems to be getting himself off to a great start. Oh yeah, one more problem with it, he stands on the toilet seat and squats to pee. It's the funniest thing ever, it's just like what his cousin Matthew used to do too. The problem with it is you have to take your pants/underpants all the way off to do it, and at age 2 he can't put them back on. Oh well, I should be grateful for this, because I have proven myself incapable of potty-training in the past with Isaac. So far Dave potty-trained Isaac and Dawson is potty-training himself. I feel like I should be able to kick up my feet and drink a pina colada, but somehow I still don't have time for that?

Dawson has transformed from his monstrous self, to the sweetest little boy. He is still stressed out when situations change, but other than that he is very easy, and has a VERY sweet personality. He talks in the sweetest voice, says please all the time, prays by himself (always praying first for Isaac), gets really excited about things with the world's cutest smile (When he was born he was so grumpy he never really smiled, but he sometimes did in his sleep and I could see then what an incredibly cute smile he had. I love it!), and covers his eyes when you get mad at him because he really doesn't want to make anyone mad. It's amazing how far he comes, and it's a good thing because I have a feeling that this baby is going to be just like him, and I already declared that this family could only handle one Dawson. So maybe we'll survive since Dawson has become so sweet.

Here he is covering his eyes. His hands go straight up to his face as soon as he senses you're mad.


And here is that happy, smiling boy, I love how he scrunches up his eyes when he smiles. Isn't he cute?

Monday, October 20, 2008

What is it?

I had an ultrasound today, done by my dr. It was fun to see the baby, who looked very healthy and very calm. In fact I don't think the baby moved the whole time. I guess that's why I hardly ever feel the baby kick anymore. Anyway, we got a great shot of the baby's privates, and we (the dr. and I) had no idea what it was. He thought it looked slightly more like a girl, maybe 60% girl, but basically it was totally inconclusive. It measured way bigger than the last ultrasound, at 16 weeks 5 days instead of 15 weeks 4 days.

So I spent the whole day obsessing over the pictures, and have myself feeling more like 60% boy, but really the pictures aren't nearly as good as a live scan. I think I'm going to have to pay for an elective ultrasound so I can know sooner than my next appointment in 4 weeks!

Sooooooo, if this baby is a boy I have spent a lot of time thinking about why that will be great. Of course I would prefer a girl, but I'm thinking about how a boy will be just as good. First of all, maybe it will be good to have boys, and then have girls at the end. We do the boy thing, then the girl thing. That might be nice. Then I got on Gap and Old Navy and couldn't find one thing I wanted to buy for a newborn girl. I don't like the colors pink or purple. So it's not like I'm dying to buy girl clothes. And I LOVE my baby boys, so I'm sure I would LOVE another.

So I'm playing the "glad game" which I learned from the movie Polyanna, do you remember that movie? There are so many reasons why I will be glad to have a boy, even though I would prefer having a girl next. It still could likely be a girl, but I'm preparing myself either way. Whatever it is, I can't WAIT to find out..... we'll see how long I can hold out.

Monday, October 13, 2008

First Steps

The first steps that babies take are SO CUTE! I just love them. All three of my kids have taken their first steps before they turn one, but not exclusively walked until after their birthday. There is only a short period of time when they take those cute, drunken sailor, steps, and then they walk like normal. We hurried to get Henry's steps on video, and it wasn't easy. But here they are, and isn't he cute?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Funny Kids

I love the funny things that kids say. I always love reading about it on other people's blogs. I frequently forget to write those things down, so here is today's attempt.

Isaac has been really funny lately because he picks up on grown up words and phrases, but doesn't quite know when they are appropriate. He tells us he's "nervous" at the funniest times. Or for example today he was going to the bathroom, and I overheard him say,

"Common toilet paper, you can do better than that!"

I don't quite know how the toilet paper could have done better, but I thought it was so funny!

And my favorite thing that Dawson says these days is, "Ouchie, help me." It sounds more like, "Outsie, hup me." He repeats this over and over when he's hurt. I love it.

Last night he was feeling sick right before family home evening. He kept saying it, "Ouchie, help me." So I told him we would pray for him in our opening prayer. I was amazed that at the age of 2 he could have faith in a God that he can't see or hear, but he believed praying would make it better. After the prayer he kept saying, "Christ fix it." He really believed that the Lord healed him.

And Henry, doesn't hardly make a peep, so he doesn't say anything funny. But he has been taking steps by himself for a week or two now. He can stand by himself for quite awhile too. Hopefully he'll be walking soon. He's still the most delightful human being on the planet!

I love my kids.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Tag

Tagged, by Jocee. I was supposed to post the fourth picture in the fourth folder of my pictures. This is what I got. This picture is at Cafe Sabor for Natalie's bridal shower. The two on the left (me and Brooke) are the sisters-in-law, and the others are Dave's sisters with Natalie and her mom at the very right. So I guess i should tag Brooke and Trisha since they're in the picture.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Will you go to the dance with me?

Now that I'm the wise old age of 26, it seems like my blog title is the best way to ask someone to a dance. That proves how old and boring I am. When I was in high school, I too wanted to ask in the most creative, never been heard of, fun and exciting way. While I was down in B-town with my family, Lauren and her friends were preparing to ask to the Halloween dance. She asked me if I had any good ideas. Honestly, I couldn't even remember how I asked/was asked to the dances. So we got on the internet and searched and searched until we found the very best idea. Lauren did a great job, and is now like the coolest girl at Bountiful High School (She already was I'm sure). Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration, but really everyone loved her idea. I told her I better blog it so we won't forget how SHE asked to the dance, since I can't remember any of my experiences.



She filled the box with these "flying pigs" and put her name at the bottom. Presumably when he opened the box, the pigs flew out.... at least we hope so!

General Conference Weekend

I always love conference weekend. It is so inspirational, and so fun to be together as a family. I love our new Prophet, President Monson, and I loved all the messages that I heard (with one more session to go!) We kept our tradition of eating Ritz crackers with Easy Cheese and Guava Juice when he spoke. The kids love it, and I do too.

Yesterday, in between sessions, we went and picked out our pumpkins. Dawson wanted to take them all home. "Bah one! Bah one."




I've always been a Halloween humbug. But my kids are really excited about it this year, so I decided to decorate a little bit more. We're going to try to have some Halloween craft days so we can make some more decorations. But our spider web and spider were the first. It was made with random stuff that we had, the spider web is torn and tied fabric, and the spider was made out of landscape fabric and a paper plate. I never knew my sewing machine could sew through paper plates before. It's a very small start for Halloween decorations, but the kids love it.


Our conference tradition (What President Monson serves when his kids come over). We ate it while the Prophet spoke. YUM!


And the boys gathered around the laptop typing up their Christmas lists. Dawson wants a flashlight. Isaac wants like 10 big things, which really means 10 x 2 because Dawson will want them too (He just doesn't know it yet.) Any advice on how to choose what to get him? He is too sharp to just forget about the other things he asked for, he'll have a mental list of what things he did and didn't get. What do I do? I'm already embarrassed if we happen to see Santa this year. Two years ago he sat on his lap and just asked for a train. This year he'll sit on Santa's lap and ask for a Storm Trooper helmet ($29.99), a Storm Trooper Gun($19.99), an R2D2, legos(I'm not ready for tiny legos that hurt when you step on them and show up all over the house!), swords, and the list goes on. I can just picture Santa's eyes getting big, thinking, "Man this kid is a spoiled brat!" This will be interesting!


Lastly, we went to Macey's in between sessions yesterday, and it was a mob-scene! I bet they make so much money this weekend! Anyway, I walked past my neighbor who took one look at me and asked if I was pregnant again. I guess I'm big enough now that there is no more mistaking it. Wow, that happened fast!

Friday, October 3, 2008

Second Trimester Acceptance Speech



Thank you, thank you. I am pleased to accept this award as I move into the second trimester of my pregnancy. Never have I been so pleased to win the second award instead of the first! I'd like to thank all those who have helped me get to this point, there are too many to name. This is such an honor, as the second trimester is such a step up from the first trimester. I sincerely look forward to this new era as I can stop sleeping all day, hopefully stop throwing up, feel the joy of the baby moving, find out the gender, grow out of all my clothes, and all the other great things that come along with the second trimester.

This first trimester could have been my hardest yet. Not necessarily the sickest, but still the hardest. It included: a lot of sleep, migraine headaches, restless legs, dizziness, nausea, vomiting, growing pains, shortness of breath, and so many other things. It has definitely scarred me enough to make me decide to take a long sabbatical after this baby is born. Yet, I am grateful for this baby, and I'm glad to have 13 weeks of all that behind me.

So, it is with great pleasure that I leave this first trimester and enter the second with high hopes of better days filled with health and productivity. Thank you.