Aimee's funeral was beautiful. I heard several people say it was the best funeral service they had been to. The viewings were very nice, it is so wonderful to have so much support from so many people. Thank you to all who came.
My husband gave the family prayer before they closed the casket, which was a beautiful prayer. Then my Mom let me put on Aimee's veil, which was such a neat privilege.
I gave the eulogy (again), which I wouldn't have it any other way. Other than Mom and Dad, no one knows her life better than me. And then afterwards we sang Homeward Bound. It was so special. Then we had the most incredible speaker, Shaun Myers (a stake president) who owns the mortuary, he did a wonderful job. Then we had a song by two former members of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. After that, the two bishops spoke and we closed the meeting with "God be with you 'til we meet again."
It was interesting, I had quite a few people ask me how I could speak and sing, without crying. Not only wasn't I crying, I actually was smiling. I had an overwhelming feeling of peace, and felt very strongly that Aimee didn't want us crying. She wanted us to be happy. That was one of the big reasons Aimee didn't want to die, she didn't want us to be sad. And I have a hard time being sad now. I'm so happy for Aimee, and I know she's so happy. I do feel a little annoyed that I can't talk to her. Or at least that she can't talk back. I bet she still can see my blog, but I can't see hers. If anyone can figure out how to hack into the mainframe on the other side of the veil, let me know.
Anyway, it was a wonderful day. Thank you to all those who helped, and for all your prayers. If you ever wonder if people know when you're praying for them, know that we do. We appreciate all your prayers, I know we wouldn't feel so peaceful and happy without them.
Here is the eulogy, very long!-
The true tests in life aren't administered in universities by professors, they aren't taken with a pencil and paper. The true test in life is life itself.
Aimee Danielle Biada was born on September 30, 1974 in Rochester, Minnesota, the first born and daughter of George and Ann Biada. Aimee arrived a month early, surprising her parents. Aimee was a sweet baby making this transition into parenthood much easier for them, this was a quality Aimee carried throughout her life: making the lives of other more pleasant, and being ever so sweet. Shortly before her second birthday, Aimee became a big sister for the first time. This was a calling Aimee took very seriously all throughout her life. Jessica was a very difficult baby, and Aimee’s sweet personality carried my parents through these tough times with her screaming baby sister. Aimee took good care of Jessica, and was very eager to help her mother. When she saw a need, she took care of it. So as the story goes, when she saw that some of Jessy’s beautiful blond baby curls might have been in her eyes, she promptly cut them off…. All of them. So proud of her hairdressing skills, Aimee couldn’t understand why Mom didn’t see the value in this haircut. She did however, hang up her scissors, and never cut hair again. Aimee and Jess grew up together with matching bows and dresses, the two little Biada girls. Aimee was kind of a bossy big sister, whenever a little sister wouldn’t comply with her demands, she would simply threaten to cease playing with that little sister. It worked every time. And then there was Aimee’s infamous pinch. She had a way of pinning her sisters against the wall and pinching our arms in a way that could never be proven to our Mom. Aimee admitted to her pinching habit later in life, and we all enjoyed laughing about it. Aimee was a perfectionist, and liked everything to be “just so.” We all adored her so much, we generally made sure that she got her way. But really, Aimee was every mother’s dream for an oldest child. She was responsible, and generous, thoughtful, and kind
Aimee’s childhood was spent in several locations including Minnesota, Santa Fe, New Mexico, Newtown, Connecticut, and Randolph, New Jersey. As a young child Aimee took dancing and gymnastic lessons.
When Aimee was 7.5 years old, she became a big sister again. She was SO excited to have another little sister. Our special bond began as soon as I was born. Aimee wanted to hold me, and help do everything for me. Our parents talk frequently of how little 8 year old Aimee would carry around her giant baby sister on her hip everywhere (And I was REALLY fat). Some of my earliest memories are of the fun things Aimee would do for me. I remember once when I was feeling scared and Aimee made me a treasure hunt. I followed the clues (written on her most “special” stationary) around the house until I found a present at the end. Aimee was always doing nice things for me, and consequently I worshipped the ground she walked on. If Aimee liked the color green, I did too. If Aimee thought that Depeche Mode was cool, so did I. And if Aimee asked me to go to the moon and pick up something for her, I just went ahead and did it. She was my “cool” older sister, and she could do no wrong.
Following my birth, my mother read the Book of Mormon, and found the missionaries of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Mom and Aimee were baptized on the same day in 1982 by the missionaries. Aimee had a testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ, and was a faithful member of the church all the days of her life. Aimee fulfilled many callings in the church, most recently visiting teaching, and teaching Relief Society, which she continued even through her sickness. She attended tithing settlement less than 2 weeks before she died, she was truly honest with the Lord until the end. Aimee was a very honest person all throughout her life, she couldn’t lie even if she tried. She was a great example to us all.
When Aimee was 17, our Mom and Dad once again had a baby girl. It had been ten years since there had been a baby in the house, and this little Lauren was scarcely put down in the first year of her life. Aside from Mom, no one held this baby more than Aimee. I would have to throw a sufficient temper tantrum to even get a turn. Aimee rocked and bounced baby Lauren during the day, and sometimes even at night. This was “her” baby, and Jessica and I knew it. Lauren and Aimee shared a special bond, from then until this day, Lauren calling her “Meme Mom”, as a child, equal in her eyes to her real Mom, which is saying a lot. Aimee truly understood Lauren in ways I never could, as they had such a likeness in their personalities.
Much to Aimee’s dismay, as she prepared to go “away” to college at Brigham Young University, our Dad was transferred to the Salt Lake City branch of IBM. Aimee attended BYU for one year, and decided that Utah State University would be more enjoyable for her……GO AGGIES! So she baffled all the counselors at Utah State who had never seen a transfer from BYU before, and moved to Logan.
During her time at Utah State, at age 21, our Mom and Dad again, had a baby girl. Aimee and I devoted a great deal of time to shopping for this baby, and fighting over what we would name her. Aimee graciously stepped aside and let me label this baby “my” baby, but still had a beautiful, close relationship with Kate.
Studies have proven that the first born child is generally smarter than the subsequent children. They generally score higher on tests, and are more successful in the world. This definitely proved true with Aimee in many ways.
Aimee performed beautifully in her academics all throughout her life. She graduated from Utah State University magna cum laude in the Business Information Systems Degree.
Struggling with the direction of her life after graduation, Aimee decided after much consultation with the Lord, that she would attend the BYU Jerusalem Study Abroad program. This truly was one of the highlights of her life. These were some of her best memories. She loved the Holy Land, and enjoyed all of her studies there. My husband Dave attended this program the year before Aimee, and coincidentally his sister Aimee, spelled with the same unique spelling, attended the same session with my sister. As Dave and my sister Aimee discussed their Jerusalem studies, they mentioned a certain book they were assigned. “I never read it,” Dave said, “Nobody did.” “I did,” said Aimee. And thus it was, when it came to academics, she gave 110%, and it paid off. Aimee developed beautiful friendships with her classmates, and still kept in touch with them. She was invited to their 10 year reunion, but didn’t live to make it to the party.
When Aimee returned from Jerusalem, she applied once again to BYU. She received the Covey MBA Scholarship to BYU and completed her MBA at the BYU Marriott School of Management in 2000. The summer after her first year of grad school Aimee had the opportunity to do an internship for Intel in Portland, Oregon. Aimee was nice enough to fly me up to visit her, and together we took a trip down the Oregon Coast.
When Aimee returned from Oregon that summer, our mother returned from Kazakhstan with at last… a baby boy! Aimee was so thrilled to finally have a baby brother, and she helped decorate his room with her favorite theme, Noah’s Ark.
Upon graduation with her MBA, Aimee was hired as a senior consultant for Deloite and Touche at their Boston branch. This was a highly prestigious offer, in the perfect location for her. She packed up and moved to Somerville, Massachusetts. She excelled in her career, as well as in her social life in Boston. She had some great friends there. While living in Boston, Aimee was able to hold the door open for President Hinckley at the temple dedication. She had the opportunity to be an ordinance worker in that beautiful temple, and later was able to do the same in the Bountiful temple. The summer of 2001 I moved out to Boston with her. We shared an apartment there with many fun nights staying up late and talking. Shortly after I moved in, the shift in the economy was making itself clear, and the layoffs at her work began. She was one of the highest paid new employees, and consequently, one of the first to be laid off. This freed up more of Aimee’s time however, and we were able to go on some fun trips together that summer. When the summer was over, I went back Utah for school, and Aimee followed shortly behind.
Aimee spent a year at home as she job-hunted, only interested in the perfect job. This time was so precious for her and the younger siblings as she once again took her role as the second Mom. No one could count the number of peanut butter sandwiches, and glasses of chocolate milk she made for those kids during that year, nor could you put a price on the relationships she built with them during that time.
In 2004, Aimee became an aunt. Aimee was determined to be the very best aunt, and she did an excellent job at it. She always knew the perfect gift to buy my boys, and she was always willing to help babysit them. I have such a vivid memory of her with my colicky little Dawson moving him from the swing, to the rocking chair, walking him around the house, trying to find any way to make him happy so I could have a break. Her nephews really loved her.
Aimee was one of the most thoughtful, generous people I’ve ever known. She was never afraid to spend money on other people. She gave the most thoughtful gifts to everyone on Christmas and their birthdays. I was always amazed by that. She was always thinking of others, and ways to serve and bless them. Aimee’s generosity continues even after she is gone. Aimee requested in her will that our family go on an incredible vacation on her to celebrate her life, and bring us happiness in our mourning. She also left money for her siblings and nephews to use for college. Aimee’s generous nature will not soon be forgotten.
Aimee sung with the voice of an angel. She naturally had a beautiful voice, and took many years of vocal training. She loved singing, and had a dream of singing in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. At this stage in her life she was “training” for this, and planned to try out for the choir in 5 years. She again took voice lessons in addition to music theory classes at Salt Lake Community College. We all loved to hear Aimee sing, and spent many hours around the piano while Jessy played and Aimee sang. Aimee and I loved to harmonize together, most especially to the songs of the Indigo Girls.
After a long search, Aimee did find the perfect job, she moved out into an apartment, and then in 2005 she purchased her own townhouse in North Salt Lake.
At Christmas time 2 years ago Aimee found a sore on her tongue. She bounced between doctors and dentists trying to figure out what this could be. At last she found an oral surgeon who diagnosed her with cancer. In February of 2006 she had surgery done on her tongue to remove the cancer. This surgery was very serious, and required a long recovery, including much speech therapy. We were worried that her greatest talent, singing, would be ruined from this surgery. The surgery was successful however, and they felt confident that they had removed all the cancer. In May of 2007 Aimee realized that the cancer had returned. Thus began the final exam of Aimee’s life.
When I think my final examinations in college, I think of a test that stretched me far beyond where I wanted to be stretched. I think of stress, pressure, temptations, and then I think of the wonderful feeling of relief when it was over. In the Doctrine and Covenants the Lord hears Joseph Smith’s prayer in his time of despair. The Lord tells Joseph, “My son, peace be unto thy soul. Thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment, and IF thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high.” The Lord gave Aimee one final test, the final exam to see HOW she would endure this trial.
Aimee went to sleep to have a routine lymphectomy. When she awoke, her life would never be the same. Aimee had to relearn talking and swallowing. She also learned that she would have to undergo months of chemotherapy and radiation.
Shortly after Aimee finished her treatments and relearned how to eat and drink, we lost our sweet Jessica. I reassured Aimee that she was safe now. Surely the Lord couldn’t take them both. Not three weeks after Jessica’s funeral, Aimee learned that there were growths in her lungs. The doctors guessed that she would have 4-6 months after that.
Aimee had always wanted to go on a cruise. In November she and her family enjoyed a care-free week of cruising in the Western Caribbean. Upon returning, Aimee became short of breath, and had a series of procedures done to try to increase her breathing capacity. She learned she would have to be on oxygen for the rest of her life.
On Christmas Eve, it became clear that the cancer was not only in Aimee’s lungs, but in her brain as well. We could see how quickly she was fading. By Christmas Day she was in full blown dementia. This was a tremendous shock to us as she appeared to be fine just a few days earlier. It has been said that as people lose their mind, their true personality shines through. As cancer began to destroy Aimee’s mind, her charming and gracious personality was abundantly evident. No negativeness. No rudeness, no sharpness. Just happy and calm and gracious.
It was three days after Christmas when Aimee’s final exam was over. Like every other test Aimee had ever taken in her life, she passed with flying colors. “And IF thou endure it well, God will exalt thee on high.” Truly Aimee did endure her trials well. I never heard her complain about her condition. Even on Christmas Eve, when asked how she was doing she answered, “Pretty good.” She was more concerned with her family and how they felt than herself.
It has been said that death is not the turning out the light because the night has come. Rather it is the the turning off the light because the dawn has come. For her the dawn has come. She is free…free from worries and sickness and the cares of this world. Her dawn has come. I mentioned that Aimee always wanted to sing with the Tabernacle Choir. Now she might have a chance to sing in a choir. One that is more glorious than even the Tabernacle Choir. Her soprano voice will be welcomed and she is probably having a time of her life. A dream come true. Aimee will sing with the “angels of heaven.”
Joseph Smith said, “The only difference between the old and young dying is, one lives longer in heaven and eternal light and glory than the other, and is freed a little sooner from this miserable, wicked world. Notwithstanding all this glory, we for a moment lose sight of it, and mourn the loss, but we do not mourn as those without hope.” It is quite a lot for the Lord to take Jessica and Aimee from us in the same year. In fact, Aimee died one day short of three months after Jessica. We don’t know why their lives were so short, but we know that it was the Lord’s plan for them. They are together now. Aimee and Jess, we mourn your deaths. But we mourn with hope. Hope for eternal life. Hope for the resurrection when your bodies will be perfected. When there is no more cancer, no more sickness, and no more sorrow. This hope comes only in and through Jesus Christ. Someone whom Aimee and Jessica loved so much.
Aimee fought a good fight. She has finished the course. She has kept the faith. Today is a celebration of her life. The life she lived and the life she continues to live in spirit paradise.
In the last minutes of Aimee’s life we read together her patriarchal blessing. Then Lauren and Kate sang to her and as they finished the song, Aimee took her last breath. The song that they sang has become a very special song to our family. They sang the song, Homeward Bound. I would like to read you the words, and then the remaining Biada girls and a dear friend Stephanie Romney will sing it to you.
In the quiet, misty morning,
When the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing,
And the sky is clear and red.
When the summer's ceased its gleaming,
When the corn is past its prime,
When adventure's lost its meaning,
I'll be homeward bound in time.
Bind me not to the pasture,
Chain me not to the plow,
Set me free to find my calling,
And I'll return to you somehow.
If you find it's me your missing,
If you're hoping I'll return,
To your thoughts I'll soon be listning,
in the road I'll stop and turn.
Then the wind will set me racing,
As my journey nears its end,
And the paths I'll be retracing,
When I'm homeward bound again.
Bind me not to the pasture,
Chain me not to the plow,
Set me free to find my calling,
And I'll return to you somehow.
In the quiet, misty morning,
When the moon has gone to bed,
When the sparrows stop their singing,
I'll be homeward bound again.
I am grateful for the plan of salvation and the sealing powers of heaven, for the knowledge that we will be together again with our dear sisters.
These pictures made me laugh. I had no idea Dawson was in the picture, I was too engrossed in Henry's cute smiles and coos.
