Note to self

Note to self... and pretty much any other mother or grandmother that might read this.

No one wins the lottery without buying a lottery ticket.

No one profits from growth and appreciation without investing.

No one catches a fish without some bait.

No one reaps a harvest without first planting a seed, and then nurturing that seedling regularly.

This is my mom. She has bought an uncountable number of lottery tickets, invested more than she should have, searched for creative forms of bait, and planted and nurtured seeds in my kids (so to speak) more than most grandmothers could even comprehend .

And consequently, my kids adore her.



Well I do too. She is the best example to me of unconditional love and of a person who would never, ever dream of making you feel bad about yourself or your life. I have only ever heard from her how wonderful my husband and children are, and of course how exceptional she thinks I am :).

My kids think the Biada household is greater than or equal to Disneyland. Nothing is ever a problem there, everyone is happy to see them, it is all-you-can-drink chocolate milk, play all day, and then crash in front of a movie in the rocking chair snuggling with whoever won that privilege. My kids are showered with love and attention from Grandpa, Grandma, 2 aunts, and an uncle.

But the point of my blog post really wasn't to showcase the best example of a grandmother I know. (Although I wanted to do that obviously) The point of my blog was to remind myself now and in 20 years that you reap what you sow. So many people are curious and frustrated when they aren't given the attention they desire from other people. Why don't they want to be with me, why don't they like me? I sometimes forget this principle, that you reap what you sow.

We have some friends in the neighborhood who just moved in within the last two months. They invited us over for dessert last night. I felt a little flustered when they called that I hadn't invited them over first. What a great example to me of this principle. They don't sit at home feeling sorry for themselves that they moved again and have no friends. They don't complain about unfriendly neighbors and cliques. No, they buy lottery tickets. They throw out some bait. They MAKE friends. Brilliant people!

Why liken this principle to my mother? Well one because I am so, so grateful for her and the relationship she has built with my kids. But also because I frequently hear mothers from my club... you know the boy mom club- moms of 4 or more boys- yep, it's a proud little club!.... that they are worried about all of their daughter-in-laws. I don't subscribe to the theory that girls don't like their mother-in-laws because they aren't blood. I think that girls who don't like their mother-in-laws don't like them because they don't treat them like daughters, and don't build relationships with the whole family, especially the grandchildren.

Am I worried about my four future daughter-in-laws. Not if I can remember this principle. If I invest in them and their children, the growth and appreciation of my love will be mine to keep. I can have wonderful relationships with them and my grandkids, I just have to "buy their chairs" (ever see Phenomenon?). I'm sure with four different daughter-in-laws, coming from different backgrounds and different cultures potentially, there will be things I won't love about them. But I solemnly swear to keep those to myself. I'm going to be the best mother-in-law in the world. And I'm going to have fun with it. I love being a boy mom. I would never trade it. I love being a member of "the club."

Note to self: pull this post out in about 16-25 years when your kids start getting married. In the meantime, share these thoughts with others in case it might bless their lives. These kinds of semi-intelligent thoughts are few and far between to this brain-dead mother of four.