Monday, October 31, 2011

Walker update

Time for another update on Mr. Walker.

He's starting to act his age. He really doesn't have the energy to nurse very much. Yesterday I think we only had 1 good feed. My milk is in though, so I am pumping and they put it through the feeding tube which goes down his nose. The tube makes him sneeze, and he'll sneeze 7 or 8 times in a row, but only if it gets irritated. The nutritionists want him to have this stuff called Neosure which has 22 calories instead of 20, but he has spit it up every time. He hasn't tolerated formula at all, so we have been lucky to have him in the NICU where they have pasteurized human breastmilk for him if I don't have enough. He's getting most of his feeding through the tube, but yesterday they took out his iv, so all his fluid is coming from breastmilk.

His bilirubin went down yesterday, but up a little today, so we'll see what happens with that.

His nurses are incredible. I have liked all of them that he has had. There is a group of former NICU parents called Common Bonds that does nice things for the parents there. They leave me goodies and cards, they provide a camera and printer for parents there, they are really nice. We even got a crocheted flannel blanket, it's green and cute. Today they are dressing them up, and they had quite a few little costumes. He is going to be Shrek. We can only keep his on for a picture since he's still on lights, but I can't wait to see some of the other babies in their costumes. There aren't very many babies in there, maybe 3 or 4. Evelyn seems to be doing better now, and I've enjoyed chatting with her parents now that she doesn't scream 24/7.

We are now skipping a feeding to see if Walker will save up some energy for the next meal. I'm on my way down there right now, so we'll see if he performs or not.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Today

Today I was officially discharged from the hospital. But I will be staying in my room on a "hotel" stay which is only $15 a night. It's a wonderful thing that they do that for the NICU parents, then I can continue to go back and forth. My schedule is like this.
-Exit the Mother/Baby unit
-Take the Elevator downstairs
-Enter the NICU
-Scrub up to the Elbows
-Find Walker usually getting his diaper changed (They change the diapers usually and they always weight them)
-Weigh him before the feed
-Sit down and they hand me my baby and a clean blanket and burp cloth
-Hope that he eats well, and sit there doing everything I can to make that happen- usually takes about an hour even though they say they will only give me 3o minutes
-Weigh him to see how much he ate and wait for threats on what they will do next
-Put him away, and make sure he's all hooked up where he needs to be
-Come back to my room
-Pump for 15 minutes, collect milk and clean pumping supplies
-Go to the bathroom
-Try to get some rest for maybe an hour before my 3 hours is up and I start all over again.

So I'm usually getting no more than 1 hour of sleep at a time. Sometimes I have skipped pumping to have a little extra time. And frequently, a phone call or meal takes up part of my sleep time.

So I'm a little tired. I find myself falling asleep in the chair with Walker, which I'd rather not do right now. It's such a different kind of fatigue though, pregnancy fatigue is your whole body all the time. New mom fatigue is a little more like you can push through the tiredness, but if you sit down and relax you can fall asleep instantly. It's a lot more pleasant. Not to mention that I can get comfortable while I sleep, which is wonderful.

Today Walker had at least 2 feeds that were a complete bust. He won't eat for anything during those meals. He won't take a bottle, binky, anything. He is completely uninterested, whether asleep or awake, he's not doing it! He had 1 feed that was decent, and then 1 that was perfect. The volume is increasing, and he was doing a lot of gulping the last time, he seemed very grateful for that.

Even in the best feeds though, the NICU nurse said he is only getting 1/3 of what he is supposed to. So we have been getting threats all day to put in a feeding tube. He is also going to be getting some kind of 22 nutrient something or other supplement every day now. Sounds gross. Helps him get some extra nutrients that a pretermer needs.

His jaundice was up today, but only a little bit. And it dropped on the graph to a lower section. So that was good news, although even if they tell me to, I don't want to take him off the lights yet. I think it will take awhile for his liver to catch up and really break down the bilirubin. Right now, it's probably just from the lights.

His breathing is spectacular. His temperature is good. His heartrate drops occasionally and sets off the monitors. There is no specific reason for this, so the nurses aren't worried about it now. His oxygen levels are almost always perfect. And as far as I know, he hasn't dropped below 5 pounds. The last two days he has hovered right around there.

The biggest problem in the NICU is Evelyn. She is his next door neighbor. She screams all the time. She screams when she's held, fed, whatever. Her parents have been so patient, but I feel really bad for them. They come to visit her and she screams in their face. Her monitors are always going off because she screams so much it messes with her heartrate, oxygen, and breathing. Walker's monitor will have a little window pop up showing what Evelyn is doing when she sets off her monitors. And if her parent's aren't there, I can just hear the NICU nurses eyeballs rolling as they go back to try and comfort her. Poor thing!

Her screaming doesn't bother Walker though. He doesn't seem to notice anything around him but me. He likes me! He wouldn't mind hanging out with me all day. But they say that he rarely makes a peep without me there. So I'm glad to know he isn't screaming when I'm not around.

Walker is getting antibiotics still in case of infection. I think tomorrow he will have the labs done and we will have more conclusive evidence of whether he ever had an infection. If he didn't, he can come off of them tomorrow. They are stinky, I can smell them on him, and I'd love for him to be done so he can come home sooner.

No word on coming home really. He needs to prove himself, and we just have to see day by day how he does on that.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Walker William Low

Baby Walker was born on Thursday, October 27th at 11:25 am. He weighed in at 5 lbs 4 oz and 18 inches long. He has a decent amount of dark hair (for a Low anyway), but I'm not holding my breath, guessing it will all fall out in a few weeks. He is sweet and adorable, looks just like a Low boy!

Although I was warned that he would stay in the hospital for 3-6 weeks, he is doing awesome. I was told that he absolutely wouldn't stay with me after birth, but he stayed for an hour and I was able to feed him. His next two feeds he didn't even suck once. But then he ate well all night, so we are on our way! His glucose is what initially took him to the NICU, but he has kept that high enough on his own today. He hasn't required any breathing assistance, looks like those steroids did the trick! He is showing some indication that he may have an infection, so he is being treated for that with antibiotics. If his culture comes back negative, he will likely be able to go home on Sunday or Monday.

He takes after his brothers with jaundice....well actually he is showing them up. He was put on the billilights shortly after he was 24 hours old. That's quite unusual, so I'm sure we'll be fighting the jaundice fight for awhile. But they probably won't keep him in the NICU for that.

The very experienced NICU nurse says she has never seen a 34 week baby eat that well. He has made everyone very impressed.

He has hardly cried at all. A little bit of squeeking, but very little crying so far.....don't think I'm naive enough to think that will last though!

I actually love having him in the NICU. It takes up a lot of time because I have to go down to the NICU for about an hour to feed and spend time with him, then I come back upstairs to pump. Add a bathroom trip and a meal in there and it's almost time to go back down. But I LOVE the NICU staff, and how well they take care of everything. Everything is monitored, every diaper weighed, we know exactly where he's at all the time on everything, so there is no need to worry. They are always taking good care of me too, they bring me drinks, offer me the boppy, hand me clean blankets and burp cloths. His binky hit the floor and they just threw it out and got him a new one. They even decorated his room with Halloween signs with his name on them. I need to get a picture of that.

I feel fantastic. I haven't even had Tylenol, not any drugs at all. I slept on my tummy last night, it felt so good! My nurse said she has worked here for a few years and she has never seen a mom come walking up from L&D herself before. I felt instantly better, and without an epidural, I could walk perfectly. I am so happy to have my baby here, and I love how that changes the dynamics of a family. These early days of having a baby are so magical, I wish I could slow time down and enjoy them longer!

This hospital is incredible. The nurses have all been perfect! My doctors are tremendous, you couldn't ask for anything more. The facility is nice, and the food is done like room service and I keep getting the most incredible meals!

I dare say this has all worked out wonderfully, although it wasn't anyone's first choice, it has been great! I feel very blessed.

More posts and pictures to come!

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Your birthday

Today is your birthday baby Walker. Born 4 years and one day later than your big brother Henry, and born in the very same room. It's 3:50 am and I woke up crying. I woke up to an empty room wishing it wasn't empty. I looked around and was hoping it had more people in it than I saw, but I felt nothing. Where are they? I know they'll come! It made me cry more.

I've never done this before. I've never woke up knowing that it would be the day. I am so sorry. No one thinks you are ready to come out. I'm so sorry I failed you. You should have 2 more weeks, 2 more pounds.

There hasn't been a nurse who hasn't called you happy. You are so happy to be in there, you play almost all day when babies are supposed to stop and nap. I wish I could leave you there awhile longer.....safely. You are sleeping now though. Your heart rate is 127, when you play it's up in the 150's.

In a few hours, grandma will go meet your brothers at home and dad will make his way up to the hospital. We'll do what it takes to bring you safely out of me and hope that you can spend as much time as you can in my arms.

I love you Baby Walker. I have loved you before you existed on this Earth. You are so wanted and prayed for, and just exactly what your brothers can't wait to have in their life! They ask about you every day. You should have seen your father's face when he saw you the first time on ultrasound. There is no one happier to be having a new son than him.

Please be safe little guy. Be strong. Life will be hard and overwhelming at first, oh what I wouldn't give to keep you in a safe womb for longer. A womb that wouldn't risk making you sick before you are born. I'm sorry baby!

Come what may today Walker, Happy Birthday. Your mommy already loves you more than words! Good luck on your big day. I've finally recognized that this is your day and not mine.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Baby Post

Not feeling like blogging, but I love to have records of pregnancy.

This weekend at 32.5 weeks I had a dr's appt and 2 trips to L&D to get the Betamethasone shots for baby Walker's lungs. At the appt I was about 2 cm and 60% effaced baby at -1. I got two shots, 24 hours apart, and I can tell a huge difference now. The steroids take full effect by 48 hours, and this little baby's hiccups just doubled in their strength. I dare say that his lungs are developed now, not that we are ready for him to come yet, but whenever he decides the time is, he will be ready. Trying to hold him in as long as possible, but not trying to set too lofty of goals. I'm guessing still that he will be here by November 8th which is in 21 days (36 weeks).

Contractions are sparse most of the time, but always occur with movement (standing up, rolling over, etc.) Sometimes get more consistent, but I'm pretty good about getting them to go away since I've been doing this for so long. The steroids made me extremely ill, but that mostly went away. I'm still left with nausea right now and I'm not sure what that is about. Lost my breakfast this morning and felt pretty sorry for myself.

All in all though, I'm doing great. I'm happy and enjoying my life and my kids right now. Slighty braindead, but that seems to be normal for me now. I'm excited to have a new baby, but enjoying my time with him inside as I know it won't last forever!